Life is Bad But the Sky is Blue

Let me tell you a story of a girl, Akira; a 17-year old teen who thought life is nothing but glitters and roses… until she fell in love and was reciprocated.

Akira D’Souza fell in love with a man, four years senior than her, in mysterious ways. She didn’t know why, she didn’t know how, but she felt the butterflies fluttering in her stomach and her head trying to burst into a million flowers. The two started dreaming lovely nonsense dreams and making sticky sweet promises, not realizing that life is designed to turn super bad as you grow up, especially when you are floating in your mid-twenties. The start was great, the transition was mundane, and fortunately/unfortunately, the end was nowhere to be seen.

Suddenly, the lovebirds realized that they have survived for half a decade and still they are far away from achieving something for themselves. The boy has changed, not in the heart but in the head; Akira changed too, not in the head but in the heart. Both have begun to see the world differently. The boy knows that if he fails to grip his actions, then he might end up being the male protagonist of Taylor Swift’s Exile. Interestingly, Akira feels the same.

One day, Akira and the boy sat under a tree, facing away from each other. They felt miserable with each other, but still too much in love. The boy said, “did you ever think that maybe we are not a match?” Akira didn’t turn but he could feel her shift a little away from him. She said, “who knows, maybe.” The boy didn’t turn. He picked up a blade of grass and begun to twist it between his fingers. Sighing, he said, “sometimes, I feel like I shouldn’t waste your time. Maybe I am holding you back from something great. What if I leave and good things start to happen in your life? Do you think it is possible?” Akira zoned out to all the times they had tried to make sense of where their life is taking them. Is their path converging or the opposite? Just four years back they directed their first break up scene. The boy was talking about leaving, she was asking for a last hug, the kiss in front of a closed bookstore she thought would be the last, him leaving her behind in a peaceful, sleepy, rain-soaked street. This whole scene could be easily planted in a blockbuster. However, the separation was a reality for mere four hours. Since then, numerous heartbreaks had materialized and they fell back together every time. Love is a sick, sick pleasure.

“Won’t you answer?” the boy asked. Akira looked above and realized that their life may be bad but the sky is blue. “Maybe. Who can tell?” she said. The boy still didn’t turn, but his heart sank. His voice now a whisper, “then why don’t you leave. At least one of us has to be strong. One of us should take the initiative. I think you should leave and make a good life for yourself,” he threw away the grass, now crushed into something incomprehensible. Both of them turned.

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Ankita Dasgupta

Ankita Dasgupta

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